My family gets the opportunity to head to the Texas Hill Country and do some disconnecting to reconnect from time to time. It is simply divine. The only thing to do (aside from a few chores here and there) is to sit around and relax. And it is absolutely fantastic because here’s the problem that I have: when I’m at home, I won’t rest until it’s time for bed.
I have become a person who works all the time. And if I have an idle moment, I either start to do work or think I should be working.
I know that this feeling and behavior is not beneficial for my family or for me. And the question that I keep asking myself is, who told you that?
Who told you that you had to be always busy and working? “Who told you that?” is a powerful question because it actually grounds your reality in the truth.
The question begs you to take an audit of your feelings. Sister, if no one has told you this yet, take heart – your feelings aren’t facts. They are your feelings at the moment.
I tend to think I should be working because I’m building my company, which demands my time and energy. Which is the truth, but it’s not the whole truth.
By the way, if anybody says being an entrepreneur is easy, they are lying through their teeth. It is the hardest thing I’ve ever done, but it is also the most rewarding and wonderful. Kinda like motherhood, am I right?!?
I get into this grind, thinking I have to do this work thing and think this must be done now. If I’m not careful, I lose sight of what actually matters most to me: the relationship with God and my family.
If I pour only into my identity as an entrepreneur, I’m missing out on the life that God prepared for me.
The question “who told you that?” is so valuable because it begs me to answer where my thoughts are rooted.
It’s a question that maybe you need to ask yourself too and more often than you may think.
Who told you that you had to look a certain way? Who told you that you had to weigh15 pounds less? Who told you that you have to earn your love by doing creating better habits? Who told you that you didn’t deserve grace when you messed up again? Who told you that you must work out to be worthy? Who told you that you failed as a parent? Who told you that you are a terrible friend? When you have a feeling that isn’t aligned with what God says, get into the habit of asking yourself: who told you that?
It’s the same question God asked Adam and Eve when they were hiding in the Garden because they were naked. God didn’t ask them, “who told you that you were naked?” because He didn’t know. He asked them so they would recognize how the devil works.
Satan works the same way now as he did back then. He is quick to remind us of all the times we failed. He tells us about the times we didn’t make the best choice, where we lied, where we lost our temper, where we weren’t patient, where we didn’t love. He reminds us of all these things in hopes that we will change our view about ourselves.
When our identity is attached to things other than who God says were are, we allow the devil to get a foothold.
However, when we question feelings that aren’t aligning with God’s truth, we can lean into God’s love and ask Him to help us see where we need to change. For me, that’s asking God for help with seeing myself as the mom who won’t sit down and watch a movie with her kids because I think it is wasted time. Is that not ridiculous? I’m a work in progress.
When we to go to the Hill Country, God shows me how important connecting was for my whole family.
He reminded me of why I’m really here. I’m not here to be a busybody. I’m not here to make sure that the way I’m seen online is acceptable to you or somebody else. I’m not here to be the perfect parent. I’m not here to never mess up. I’m not here to weigh less on the scale. I’m where I am right now because God put me here. He wants me to show up and be the most perfectly imperfect version of Sarah, who is in desperate need of a Savior.
When we get wrapped up in the untruths and feelings, we need to ask who told you that?
A special note for those who stand in front of the mirror and think that you are unworthy because you just don’t love what you see in the mirror. The truth is God is looking at your heart, and He loves you so much. Richard Rohr says, “Most of us were taught that God would love us if and when we change. In fact, God loves you so that you can change. What empowers change, what makes you desirous of change is the experience of love. It is that inherent experience of love that becomes the engine of change.”
My friend, when you’re sitting there in the mirror thinking you’re not enough, who told you that?
You are loved and don’t have to gain that love by doing something or looking some way. You have God’s love right now.
The fact that you are loved by God, your Creator, is this beautiful vehicle of change. Use it.
God is whispering to me about resting and keeping the Sabbath holy. He’s showing me how to and ways to put little pinches of the Sabbath in every single day. He’s showing me that I can pump the brakes daily and disconnect and connect with my loved ones.
What is He saying to you?
If you are frustrated and overwhelmed, start asking who told you that and like meet that question with actual truth. It will help you shift your perspective.
Maybe like me, you need to pump the brakes a little bit and relax. Perhaps you need to start seeing yourself as God sees you in the mirror. Maybe you need to start choosing to love first instead of trying to earn love.
Be patient with yourself, and lean into God’s love.